There follows a public health warning issued jointly by the government and those masters of the middle-age malaise, PUNKS NOT DAD...

Please keep this information safe. You may need to

refer back to it if a man you know becomes infected

WHAT IS MAN FLU AND

HOW IS IT DIFFERENT

FROM ORDINARY FLU?

Mandemic flu is different from ordinary flu because it’s a really

nasty virus that appears occasionally in men and spreads very

quickly, particularly during major sporting events or before and

after bank holidays.

Man flu has some elements of a similar but weaker virus found

in women and children. However, whereas women and children

can just get on with things, Man Flu renders the average man

completely unable to cope and therefore reliant on the kindness

of others while he sits on the sofa moaning.

Male medical experts believe that Man Flu shares many invisible

symptoms with other illnesses such as leprosy, the bubonic

plague and the bends. They are expecting to find conclusive

proof of this as soon as they get back to work and are pondering

it even now whilst watching Cash In The Attic and drinking soup.

HOW DOES MAN FLU SPREAD?

Flu viruses are made up of tiny particles and stuff that noone can

see, and therefore we can't be sure if they actually exist or not.

It’s almost definitely in the air or something, and probably lives

on bus tickets, door handles or maybe salad.

All we know is that when a man gets Man Flu, he knows, and

you have to take his word for it, plump up the cushions on

the sofa and hand over the remote.

WHAT HAVE THE UK GOVERNMENT

BEEN DOING TO PREPARE?

We have been planning for a flu mandemic for a number of years,

and the UK plan has been identified as one of the best by the

World Dads Health Organization. While the current situation is

serious, there’s good reason for us to be confident that we can

deal with it. We have a good stockpile of Handy Andies, Tomato

Soup, Lockets and plenty of old films and TV programs

(including Columbo and The Great Escape) – enough to treat

more than 20 million men, and we are planning to increase this.

Tomato soup and lockets are not a cure, but they can help a

man to feel a little bit better if taken within 2 hours of symptoms

developing, consumed in comfort on a sofa, in front of a good

old film, with the newspapers handy and nobody else in the

vicinity to bother him.

When Man Flu strikes, it may be useful to remember

the following slogan:-

CATCH IT.

PHONE IN SICK.

HAVE A GOOD SIT DOWN.

Punks Not Dad, like many Dads, have first hand experience of

the misery that Man Flu can cause, and are proud to be

associated with the Man Flu Public Health Awareness Campaign.

All royalties* from their hit** song ‘Man Flu’ (available for

download from Itunes, Amazon, and available on their CD Album

‘We Are The Dads’) will be donated towards the cause.

* minus expenses

** ?

For more information please go to www.punksnotdad.co.uk