Here's JOHNNY! Punks Not Dad's Johnny Cardigan downs allen-keys for a quick Q&A for R-T-Y-D

On Wednesday 16th September Rock-Til-You-Drop presents its first 'punk special' at the Dublin Castle in Camden. As well as The Outbursts, 14 Carat Grapefruit and The Probing Cranks, you can witness Punks Not Dad's debut London gig.

Earlier this year, the band released their first album We Are The Dads, as well as the hugely successful single In Me Shed, with its hilarious accompanying video, that has been virally-transmitted around the world ever since.

They have been played on BBC6 by Tom Robinson, and interviewed on BBC Wales, and I'm sure they are planning further releases and activity in order to maintain the momentum of their somewhat belated rock 'n' roll swindle.

Punks Not Dad's guitarist Johnny Cardigan took a break from assembling yet another piece of IKEA furniture, and other similarly infuriating DIY chores assigned to him over the bank holiday, to do a Q&A for R-T-Y-D.

Here's JOHNNY!

Name: Johnny Cardigan

Age: 47

Place of birth: Birmingham

Star sign: Scorchio

Are you a pro, semi-pro, or a hobbyist musician? Perm. Any one from three at any given time.

How old were you when you started playing guitar? 10

Tell us about your first guitar? Awful sunburst Kay SG copy. Sprayed it black – and it was still awful!
What does a mature songwriter like you have to say? A damn sight more than I did when I was a kid

Who is your favourite guitarist? Johnny Marr/Paul Weller/Mick Jones
What was the first record that you ever bought? I think ‘Cum on Feel the Noize’

What was the last record, or CD, that you ever bought? Downloaded ‘The Best of Tiny Tim’ from iTunes for my girlfriend. Brilliant!

The first lyric that comes to mind? ‘In the midst of life we are in debt’ – Mozza – ‘Sweet and Tender Hooligan’

What was the best gig you ever saw? Ramones – 1977 – Birmingham Odeon

Your favourite venue? Birmingham Town Hall – for the memory of my first ever gig – AC/DC!

The best period in rock history? 1976 - 1978

The worst year in rock history? Whatever year we’re in now…

What was for breakfast? Coffee and cigarettes as per…

How do you prefer your eggs? From a chicken

Electric or manual (toothbrush, that is)? I lost the manual for my electric one…

Boxer shorts, underpants or commando? No score drawers

Broadsheet or tabloid? Rather fond of the old Grauniad

Tea or coffee? I like my coffee like my women – strong, dark and with a frothy head
Mars or Snickers? Marathon

Ale or lager? A nice Chianti

Crack or heroin? I went to a dyslexic rave and saw someone trying to inject a heron…

Indian or Chinese? What? As the next global economic superpower? Definitely Chinese.

Labour , Conservative, Socialist, green, etc? Anarcho-syndicalist with Stalinist tendencies

ITV or BBC? Cartoon Network

East Enders or Coronation Street? Crossroads

HD ready or never ready? HD? Hard Drive? Hugh Dennis? Humpty Dumpty?

Who makes you laugh? Eric Morecambe

Who makes you weep? David Cameron (although this may answer the previous question too)

Who makes you sick? The BNP

Who killed Bambi? Eddie Tenpole

Who killed Liddle Towers? The Angelic Upstarts

Atheist, agnostic or believer? ‘Then I saw her face – now I’m an agnostic…’

Do you believe in magic? I believe in Penn and Teller

Do you believe in the Westworld? Blimey – weren’t Theatre of Hate just a terrible band?
Do you know the way to San Hose? Just down the A357 – then turn left at Sainsburys – you can’t miss it.

Do you remember the first time? I do remember the first time I heard Do You Remember the First Time by Pulp – I thought it was fab…

The Beatles or The Stones? The Kinks

Roxy or Bowie? Bolan

The Clash or The Pistols? The Adverts

Madness or The Specials? The Beat

Weller or Townsend? The Modfather, obviously

Queen or Prince? Latifa or Buster?

Madonna or Kylie? Jason

Blur or Oasis? Suede

The Monkees or Arctic Monkeys? The Blow Monkeys

Doherty or Winehouse? Dean Martin

Harvest or After the Goldrush? I prefer ‘Neil Jung’ by Teenage Fanclub

Quadrophenia or Tommy? Both awful – have you seen Toya & Sting trying to act? Give me ‘Slade in Flame’ any day.

School’s Out or I Wanna Be Your Dog? ‘Teenage Rampage’ - Sweet

Psycho Killer or Blitzkreig Bop? Hey Ho Let’s Go!

Anarchy in the UK or God Save The Queen? 'Holidays in the Sun'

1977. The first memory that pops into your mind? Listening to ‘Pretty Vacant’ on the radio in my Dad’s car. That, and doing my O Levels.

What were you doing in 1987? Conceiving my daughter in a rather grotty flat in Brixton. Having a good time.

And 1997? If you can remember the 90’s, you weren’t really there…

Where have all the good times gone? Same place all the flowers went…

Where the hell is Babylon? Dunno – but I’m reliably informed that it’s burning.

Where’s Captain Kirk? Ah! Still got the 7” single! Spizz was the man!

The kids are alright. Are they? No, the Dads are Alright.

What did school teach you? The formation of ox-bow lakes, quadratic equations and that CSE Drama is no foundation for a career.


The trouble with mature musicians.. is organizing gigs around baby-sitters
The trouble with Rock-Til-You-Drop.. they will insist on sending you questionnaires

The trouble with your band.. is that our drummer (Adrian Viles) believes it’s entirely possible for him to do two different gigs with two different bands in two different towns on the same night – resulting in ‘musical differences’…

The trouble with London.. is that I don’t live there any more. Oh, and Bojo.

The trouble with this country.. is Jeremy Clarkson

What do you do for money honey? I’m Angus Young’s personal school tie provider

Whatever happened to the heroes? We can be heroes, heroes and villains, search for the hero inside yourself, I’m holding out for a hero, er…

What is and what should never be? Unfortunately, another Led Zep album

What a waste? Ask Joyce and Vicky

What the world needs now? Is an end to third-world debt, unilateral nuclear disarmament and compulsory contraception for the stupid.

And please leave us with some sound advice: Sound advice? Too much top on mic number two and turn the guitar up to 11!